I suffor headaches on days when I am either stressed about something, or if I'm on a day schedule (meaning I sleep at night). Though sometimes, they come for little reason at all, bringing with them a constant exhaustion that never goes away. This is one of those weeks, where headaches plague me and I feel so weak that all I want to do is lie down for the day. It's so hard to move sometimes in this state. Painkillers no longer work for me, my body has grown resistant to them over time, which brings no comfort.
Then lonliness and depression set in as well, as if the physical symptoms weren't enough to deal with. But then, who do I talk with? The few friends that I do have are busy with their own lives and needs, I would only burden them with mine and I don't want to be that burden.
It seems I've always been a burden to others, and it's always been obvious to me that others feel that I have been as well. Afterall, there are things that others can do effortlessly that I simply can't, such as driving. It's frustrating, more for me than them, because I can't be attentive enough to be safe on the road, and for this reason it would be not only irresponsible, but also reckless to attempt it. So I have to depend on other people... which only burdens them.
I feel cold...
I must sleep. Perhaps I will dream this time, though something tells me I will wake up no more rested than I am now. Tomorrow will bring a new headache, like so many other weeks like this have in the past.
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